Country Roads
by Inks Inc
Summary: "I have had it up to my back teeth listening to you two children bickering for the last hundred miles. If I hear one more word… I am going to stop this car again and you will not like it. This is your final warning. I have had it. Last chance, one more word…and you're both for it. Are we clear?" A very long car ride pushes Gibbs to the very pin of his collar. WARNING: Spanking.


"If you two don't cut it out I'm gonna pull over and cut your damned heads off."

Gibbs' voice was low and infused with exasperated tiredness. It was far from a raised voice but it still carried over Abby's slumbering snores coming from the passenger seat. Releasing Tim's head with reluctance, Tony slumped back in his seat as Tim angrily fixed his hair. It had been a long journey and it was still far from over. Tensions were running high, but none more so than Gibbs' whose eyes itched with tiredness as he concentrated on the winding country roads, having long since decided that the other car occupants were in no fit state to drive. The continual bickering that he'd had to endure for the last two hours however had him rethinking that decision. He knew it was just from sheer tiredness and cabin fever, but the two boys' were really testing his very limited patience. He settled comfortably into the pouting silence that ensued after his barking command, but he really ought to have known better than to think it was going to be anything more than temporary.

"Why do you have to breathe like that? You're not a wounded antelope you know."

Tony snorted in outrage.

"Can't a guy _breathe_ now? What, do you have to be a McKnowitall from MIT to afford the luxury of oxygen? Gee, you should have said. I would've left my lungs back at the scene. You know the ones, the _plague_ ridden ones that sometimes have negative effects on my breathing. But don't worry about it, as long as the precious Timmy is comfortable. That's all that matters."

"Oh please, why didn't you go into the arts with an attitude like that? You're such a-"

The car suddenly screeched to a halt, effectively stomping out the conversation in an instant. Gibbs turned slowly; the nightly hue of the sparse street lamps making him positively demented looking. The two younger men suddenly gulped, realising that they may have pushed the old man a tad too far. "Abby is sleeping," he growled. "You wake her up, and I will give her every permission to use both you knuckleheads in whatever experiment she so chooses for the next month. I don't care if she takes your livers to do it, she can go right ahead. I have had it up to my back teeth listening to you two children bickering for the last hundred miles. If I hear _one more word…_ I am going to stop this car again and you will not like it. This is your final warning. I have had it. Last chance, one more word…and you're both for it. Are we clear?"

The throaty swallowing was perfectly in unison.

"Yes Boss."

Still growling to himself, Gibbs kicked the car into gear once more, grateful for Abby's amazing ability to sleep through just about anything. Unused to field work, she was beat. His eyes burned with tiredness and he kept a sharp eye open for any coffee place that might be open, knowing that his chances were slim. They were deep in the heart of the "boondocks" as Tony and Tim had dubbed it, and he was lucky there was even a road to drive on. He yearned for civilisation and peace. But he was far from it and his trusty car could only go as fast she was going. A sleepy silence settled in the car, his senior and junior agents effectively silenced. And that lull continued for a blissful hour or so, he was just at the pinnacle of enjoying the peace and quiet when it was rudely interrupted. He had been so caught up in enjoying said silence, that he'd not paid any attention to his boys' ability to fight without even opening their mouths. And just such a fight had been raging for the last half hour unknowns to him, culminating in a severe breach of the peace.

A dangerous breach of the peace.

The object of the dispute, the sole iPod in the car, suddenly went sailing into the air and across Gibbs' peripheral vision. Startled, he swerved dangerously close to low lying ditch. The cars wheels spun wildly as he struggled to retain total control, one hand instinctively reaching out to protect Abby who was thrown forwards by the force of the unexpected diversion. Amazingly, she continued to sleep as the wheels screeched on the wet road, struggling to completely right itself. After thirty seconds of extreme panic gripping his soul, yet betraying none of that panic on his face, Gibbs had the situation entirely back to basics and brought the car to a sliding halt. Killing the ignition on the deserted country road, he kept the lights idling as he turned with the most terrifying expression to the two equally terrified back passengers. Picking up the iPod from where it lay happily in his lap, he held it up slowly. His voice when he spoke was so cold both boys' expected ice crystals to drop from his mouth.

"Which one of you threw this?"

Deep feelings of shame danced across both Tony and Tim's faces as they stared back with ashen complexions. Their squabble now seemed absolutely ludicrous and neither needed to be told that the whole incident could have ended very differently. Every one of them could have been killed or badly injured and they knew it. Glancing at each other, both knew the other was going to tell the truth. Even though the truth was the same as signing their own death warrants.

"We both did."

It was true. It had happened so fast that even Gibbs hadn't seen it, but it was true. Both had grappled over the damned iPod in a frenzied attempt to claim the distraction for themselves, even though it was technically Abby's. In the commotion, it had gone spinning from both of their hands and into the direct path of one very tired, one very pissed Leroy Jethro Gibbs. As he looked at them, the eldest of the four knew he was being told the truth and felt a tiny modicum of pride in amongst the burning fire of rage in his gut.

"Out."

As soon as he'd said it, Gibbs himself was out and shutting the door quietly. He needn't have bothered, Abby was still snoring. With their legs like lead, Tony and Tim exchanged looks of horror before sloping out as well and shutting the doors gingerly. Standing at the hood, Gibbs beckoned them to him with a sharp jerk of his head and they were standing in front of him, bathed in headlights, in a matter of seconds. With his arms folded firmly across his chest, Gibbs did his best to _not_ strangle his people. Though he very dearly wanted to and would no doubt earn the sympathies of any reasonable jury. The looks of shame that were on both of their faces was their only redeeming quality in that moment and he did his best to take note of them.

"You two idiots could have killed us all. I don't want a big story about whose damned music thingy it is. You are federal agents, not kindergarteners. What in the _hell_ do you think you were playing at? Is that what I should expect from you? To act like total buffoons just because you're in an enclosed space together? Is that the best I can expect from the two men that are supposed to be my right and left hands in any given hail of bullets? _Really?"_ The looks of shame, illuminated heavily in the lamplight, deepened intently. Neither were stupid enough to say they were sorry, it was implied and that was the best they could do. Guilt dogged the pair of them as they caught the slumbering frame of Abby in their peripheral vision. They could have been the reason she was in a hospital bed. Gibbs looked at them intently, disappointment freely colouring his face, and he knew exactly what they were thinking. He sighed deeply and pointed to the hood of the car. There was no sense in delaying the inevitable.

"Get your asses over that hood. I warned you and now you've gone and done it. You think this car ride was bad up till now? Wait until you're trying, and failing, to sit for the next three and a half hours. Then you're gonna know all about it. I can't believe I have to do this on a dead ass country road in the middle of the night with the two _brats_ that are supposed to be my highly trained agents'" He glared and they flinched heavily. "Bend over, now. You both are gonna learn a serious lesson in road etiquette."

It was a testament to how moronic and guilty they both felt that neither argued.

Feeling a hundred and one years old, Gibbs shook his head and reached up to remove his belt. The buckle was secured tightly in his hand in a millisecond and the familiar reluctance bubbled in his gut. Biting his lip and pushing it down, he moved forward three steps until he was right behind Tony, who was closest to him. Placing a hand on the small of his back, he had to conjure up every image of fatal road crashes that he'd attended to over the years and put Tony, Tim and Abby's faces on the muddle of mangled bodies. As soon as he did that, his arm moved of its own accord and the balmy country air was sliced with the swift stroke of the belt. Tony's yelp was louder than usual in the crisp night and cut right through Gibbs as he drew his arm back again, and again, and again. The strapping was hard and fast and it wasn't long before he felt the familiar limpness radiate throughout the kid's torso. Swallowing hard, his ears caught the tell tale sounds of sniffing in the crook of Tony's arms and he patted his back before stepping to the side.

It took pretty much everything he had to place his hand on the small of Tim's back.

McGee's strapping was every bit as fast and as hard as Tony's had been. The night air was assaulted by the cracks of his belt and the corresponding yelps it produced. As he felt his resolve weaken, Gibbs recalled the mangled mass of bodies in order to make it through. The belt fell again and again until the same limpness spread throughout Tim's torso and then it immediately stopped and the same pat on the back was given as Gibbs stepped back. He gave the boys' some time to comport themselves as he slipped his belt back on and swiped a hand across his damp brow. They hadn't stirred but he knew they would in a moment, neither one willing to let the other see the dampness around his eyes.

The burning in his ass was at inferno level and Tony had to work very hard to get himself under control, even though he'd had more time to do so than Tim. Gibbs had really worn them out and he knew he was going to be feeling the effects for a few days. Feeling the vulnerable nature of his position, he dragged the cuff of his shirt across his eyes and ensured complete dryness before stiffly getting to his feet. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw McGee do the same thing and felt serious pride for the probie. He'd had less time to get himself together. Slowly the two righted themselves and turned to face an awaiting Gibbs with slightly sheepish expressions on their faces, both sporting red rimmed eyes that neither would ever comment on.

It was an unwritten rule.

"Have I gotten through to you two now?"

The monumental shift in Gibbs' voice was evident. Gone was the angry, frustrated tone and in its stead the gentle, forgiving tone that both associated with a sore ass. Neither spoke for a moment, glancing at each other and figuring out their answers. When they did speak it was in tandem and it was sincere.

"Yes Boss."

Gibbs nodded and accepted the truth. He let the two stew for a moment before taking a step towards them. The breadth of his arms and chest allowed him to pull both red faced boys' into a quick embrace with ease. Ruffling each agent's hair, he spoke quietly. "Not my favourite way to spend a road trip so for the love of god, calm it down. Ok?" Letting them go with another gentle ruffle of sandy brown hair, he grinned at their fervent nodding. His forgiveness was evident and all three knew the whole debacle would never be mentioned again. Jerking his head towards the car, Gibbs raised a brow.

"I think there's a burger place maybe twenty minutes ahead. I'm buying. Get in."

The roll of the blue eyes couldn't be helped as identical grins broke out and the two raced very gingerly and very stiffly back to the car. As he slipped into the driver's seat, he felt a pang of pity at the predictable yelps that escaped his two reprobates and resolved to throw those disgusting shakes they liked so much in with their burgers. The car was utterly silent as he kicked it back into gear and he raised a brow. "You two can talk you know," he informed them gently, "Just don't argue is all I'm asking." Sleepiness had set in with both Tim and Tony and they shrugged sluggishly. "Too tired to talk Boss," Tony informed him. "Yeah," Tim echoed, "Talking requires so much…effort." Gibbs rolled his eyes and muttered "if I'd know that I would have whooped you both hours ago," under his breath.

Tony opened his drooping eyes with difficulty.

"We heard that."

Smiling, Gibbs stepped on the gas as the two in the back struggled to find a seating position that didn't exacerbate the forest fire raging in their asses. After another half an hour of sleepy squirming, the bright lights of a dubious diner shone through the windshield and Gibbs cleared his throat. "Alright guys, we're at the burger joint. You want to go in or get drive-thru?" His question was greeted with speculative glances as Tony and Tim considered their options. Going in would be a welcome break from the car, but they'd both just found the seating positions that burned the least. Going in would mean sitting on hard diner seats and losing that position. The answer was clear. God had given them an out and placed a drive-thru in the middle of the tangle weed boondocks.

"Drive-thru."

Gibbs chuckled and looked into the rear view mirror devishly, knowing their thought process.

"Sorry boys, I lied. There is no drive-thru."

…..

A/N: Random One-Shot.

…..


End file.
